Cougars

I was out at the weekend for Birthday drinks down the West End of Glasgow. One of the guys there was saying that his main thing for the weekend was to hook up with a cougar. Which is good I like people setting goals in there everyday life its how you reach for more the next day.

For those unaware, a “cougar” is an older woman who tries to appear younger than her age, in an effort to both snag a hot young man and, additionally, remain culturally relevant. Basically there like the Jason Bourne's of the MILF world, they like it hard fast and on there own terms.

At that point a woman in her 50's with an old style cardigan enters the bar and as a joke I point out and say, "there you go mate ones just walked in".

He turns round to look and then back to give me such a disappointing stare. "No mate Cougars are in there 40's really good looking and up for young guys, shes more like a leopard".

Fuck sake man there is such a thing of taking your life to seriously. Now at this point my over honest sensor kicked in and I was really tempted to point out that a guy over the 30 mark isn't really cougar bait is he. They don't want a well put together successful gentleman on the fast track to a country club membership & a toupee. They want a fucked up wretch of an adolescent who drinks excessively, no job, steals his neighbours Wi Fi and buys his I tunes on installments.

But of course I'm a different man now, got to let people be people you know.

Mr Bison